Lan midnite show

Went to watch midnite show - Exodus... This was the first time that I wanted to fast forward the movie!!!! Fainted* Aileen even slept for the entire movie arr!!! Those audience sat at the back row left after an hour of the show!!! This was the preview summore!!! Not more than 30 people I guess... pathetic

Before the midnite show, kekekeke went to pool!!! yeaHHHH... Started to like pool. Must learn it before i leave to US....

Sakae Sushi

Today i planned to go kl sentral to help aunties to buy their purses... Who knows...
the bus broke down at the bustop in front of victoria station =.=!!! I was not sure whether I was lucky or bad luck that I met Shum Khe Kong (hahahah). He picked me up then he wanted to go to Alliance bank in bangsar so i teman him. Supposedly, there was a Alliance bank but we coulden find it. He and I were starving at that moment so we ended up eating sakae sushi in bangsar village which cost each of us 3o bucks. He claimed that it was my fault... then I blamed him that it was his mistake too. Ruined my plan. hahahaha

But sakae sushi is better than sushi king lorrr....

Was I making the right choice?

Leaving this blog outdated for more than 5 months. And today i decided to update it and what kind of title should i post? Finally decided to use the previous title, but in past tense - Was I making the right choice?

Hmm... Tooooooo many things happened in these 5 months. These expreinces, incidents, naïve decisions and thoughts have totally changed my perspective forever. Thanks to them. I would not be mature if these did not happen to me...

I did neither make the right nor wrong choice. It's just depending on how I perceive. Holding and letting go are just easy for me. But, letting go those sweet memories is tougher than I presume. Because of these sweet memories intrude in my mind suddenly, I can't simply let it go. However, I still have to face the truth. The truth that will assure the best for us in our future.

Maifen told me that friends are just passers-by in your life. It is true. Undeniably, our friendship has changed. I can't talk much about it. Just wanna wish you to be happy in your life. My lovely housemates as well. Love you girls!!! You girls are great!!! And my former roomates, stella, and former housemate, chinkiat... Both of you really influenced me a lot.

My clubs' stuff also affected me deeply. Xia Xiang Tuan, Good Shepherd Girls' Home, MAFE etc... Oh My Gush... Won't forget how great these are!!!

Am I making the right choice?

There are many choices in one's life. But, until certain extend, it is limited. I am unsure with my decision. I have no ideas. I guess because I have been alone for myself for few years and I get used to it. I really get used to it...

Chia Ying told me before that do not make decision that will trouble you and become your obstacles in accomplishing your dream. Sis adviced me that do not follow the feeling but pray for guidance from God. They are convincing me that I am wrong. But, they are right, I guess. And because of these words, I always have doubt on my decision. Sometimes, I wish that I can do things alone, enjoy my own life without considering any views of others. Just leave me alone....

Goshhh... I really have no ideas what I am typing...
No confidence at all...

bystander effect

Hey!!! You are a psyc student. You should know what is bystander effect, but why did you make it happen??? Why din you help her??? Where is your love??? Couldn't you just walk down from the bus and help her to cross the street??? You did realize roads in Malaysia are the most dangerous in the entire world. You should help her!!!! Couldn't you just spend another RM1.50 to get to your place after helping her??? DAMN!!! I felt sorry for her... I shouldn't be like that. I shoudn't be dubious. Arghhh... feel guilty now....

Sigh
=.=

=l

There are options for me to choose but the problem is I have choice phobia... Nan told me before, "Gal, you shouldn't have choice phobia. If not, you will miss the chance. Once you have missed it, it's gone..." Gosh!!! But the point is I really do have choice phobia. I know that some chances come to our life just for once. But, I am confused, I am doubting. I have done many ways to convince me myself. But, they seemed useless. The bad feelings just emerge without my permission. And of course, these feel uncomfortable and bad, very bad.

God, please guide me...

Met Rebin this morning. We went to mamak and chitchatting. We chatted on "MC family". We used to watch mid night show and we needed to take 3 taxis since our family was too big. We used to celebrate special occassion together, in a huge group. Unfortunately, I have to use past tense because it's over. No more "MC family". We are not as close as we used to be as well. Some of us have changed. Erm... I think is all of us have changed. It's memorable. Even though we are splitted, the moment we spent together is always in my heart.

DoubtS

As a Christian, mom used to insist that sis and I MUST find boyfriends who are Christians too. But now, I think she has totally changed her mind because her dearest daughter, my lovely sister, has been hurt savagely by a Christian ;-( As a mother, I can know that she wants us to meet the "best" men who are able to take care wholeheartedly for us. She doesn't care Christian or not Christian anymore but as long as not Muslim lar...

No doubts, my "principle" is shaky now. I witnessed how tough it was to overcome broken heart. I witnessed how this influenced my sis' life. I witnessed how love "alter" to hatred. I witnessed how a girl who is naive becomes a girl who is fulled of revenge in her life currently. I witnessed and heard all these horrible scenes... These give me a shiver cold in my heart.

Sometimes, I am afraid. Afraid of everything... Afraid of love but wish to seek it. Afraid of those who wear masks but yet they are my friends. Afraid of spliting but must face this. Afriad of change but it is good for everyone in certain circumstances. However, I know that if I afraid of everything I wont be able to experince value of life and I will be having dull life. God gives us lives.... I should appreciate my life.

I really don't know what should I do now. The only thing is to pray and leave to God. Hope these kind of feelings will totally disappeared within me and my sister.

May God bless my sis and her ex...
Forgiveness enable a person to lift down the heaviest burden in life and walk gracefully....