EMULATE

Hmm....
I am sure that some of us is emulating someone's accomplisment. But, why should we emulate??? To acheive a better self? Or to fulfill the desire of being outstanding? Why can't we just emulate "ourself" instead of others? Aren't you feeling tired? Do we feel happy when we comparing ourself with others? I believe everyone has its own uniqueness. HOWEVER, when we compare our ownself with others, our uniqueness is disappearing. When your uniqness is disappearing, our trueself is gone... totally gone...
When we think of others' acheivements, and we strive to go beyond them INSTEAD OF OURS.
~ PITY~~
Because we don't know who we are. What we know is just "COMPARE, COMPARE & COMPARE"!!!

Dear friends,
The most vital is the learning process NOT the outcome of the process. Don't live because of those expectations. Live happily because you are the one who you are...

=p

Yesterday went to watch movie whom Rebin claimed that he cried for the first time in the cinema...

BUT, I DIDN'T... maybe i have dried my tears after watching pan's labyrinth or maybe it's a movie about how MAN pursues his happyness instead of WOMAN.
But, there was a scene which made my heart broken - Chris hugging Christopher and slept in the toilet. Man, who supposedly to be the dominant of the family, ended up in sleeping in the toilet due to disability of paying the rent and was chased away by Raulph. How HURT it is....

SO
Guys,
Try your very very very very best to provide your loved one "the best life" and the devotion, of course, is come from your heart....
=)

PRETENSES

We seldom, seldom and seldom shade off our pretenses, aren't we? Everyone of us is wearing the mask and pretending that is the true self... What a pity world! When you know a person in-depth, undeniably, it will send ur heart a shiver...

A partner whom you have gotten involved for more than 5 years, suddenly did sth that you yourself wont believe, & humiliating you that you are not feminine enough & blamin your "immature" has caused this broke-up; you tellin me that you don't like it & yet you tell others you like it.

Why am I always "sandwiched"? Why choose me?
and please don't insult my belief...

PLEASE use your brain to reflect urself! Once you are on your stage, you will like the stage and you cant end ur show already... then the audience will enjoy your show so much because it's free of charge and you play both roles - the director and actor.

it's raining again...

juz back from a movie - pan's labyrinth. it has totally convinced me that i hate violence sooooooooooo muuuuuuuuuccccccccccccchhhhhhhhhh..... it's obviously a violence movie but my tearS just fell on my cheeks. HEY MISS VIVIAN! WHY DID U CRY????

AARRGGHH!!! i hate rainin.... it's really make me feel bad, absolutely bad. Can you stop rainin huuh????

had a small talk with peggy - telling her that i felt like quiting my acedemic and fly, fly to the places where i wan, do wat i have wished for soooo loonggggg. but i cant...

goin to sleep now... wish i can dream what i have wanted for soooooo looonnnngggg....

nite nite

To be continued

This morning i saw Genting again. What a lovely view.... I went to do my stuff and prepare to go to college. When i came out from the kitchen, the view became vague as the cloud had covered it. I was wondering - If i were in Genting, will i consider it as cloud or just fog???? From my balcony, i could ensure that it was cloud but how bout if i were there???

To be continued......

CAN I???

Presentation from amelia's grp was good as the topic "death and loss" fit today's condition of mine and my friends. i really dont know what can i do to help them or decrease the clumsiness of the situation when we meet together. i realize that when you know something that others don't know, it doesn't benifit you. nonetheless, it makes you feel worse. i m doubting that can i be brainwashed??? i don't wan to be distracted by these... i wanna give up. give up everything except my goals...

i also dun want to think about you anymore... i am pissed off now, SO can you just disappear in front of me, Mr. S??? you have run in my mind for a long time and don't you feel tired, huuh???

can i just fly to bora-bora island or maldives, settle down and spend my entire life there? or can i just fly to sudan and become the full time volunteer and dealing with the little angels?? this is what i want!!! i really want to abandon my burdens and do what i want... but life is not that easy... can choose what kind of person you want to be... Y CANT LIFE BE EASY????

hope i will be fine soon
& get back to my normal life...

it's raining day

The moment I woke up, I guess it's solved adi. I was lying on my bed with Alicia by my side, contemplating whether displacement in Freud's defense mechanism did exist or not, and my answer was "YEA". I thought of the movie "crash" which suggested that one scene would cause the other scene even though they were unrelated.
Few days ago, I was frustrated and I threw my anger towards him... I know he is innocent. Obviously, I was experiencing displacement. BUT, like the movie crash, he has provoked something that he himself dosen even know how extreme the impact towards their lives and I coulden stay calm. I hope they will be alrite soon...
"my freinds, the most important thing when you end or start a relationship is - you should learn something which is able to make a growth in your life. If not, the relaionship is totally meaningless."

Hope all of us will discover our true love
And
I am sorry....